Welcome to my World of Wonderment
Of course you already know the many reasons you shouldn't vote for Barack Obama -- his last name is one letter off from "Osama," his middle name is Hussein, he's an Ay-Rab Muslim, and he wants to take away your guns, which means you'll be unarmed with an Al Qaeda operative in the White House, which you won't even be able to call the "White" House any more because he's, well, you know. (Don't worry, Rednecks, I know you know what I mean, even if the Liberal Jew-Run Media™ won't let me say it outright.)
But did you know that voting for the opponent of Osamabama (and his Baby Mama) won't be all that great for you, your wife/sister, or your 13 kids, either? Before you head to your polling place on Wednesday, November 5, check out these factoids the LJRM™ doesn't want you to know about Senator John McCain. ("Factoids," by the way, are similar to "facts," but less scientific, and therefore more believable. But these are all obviously true anyway, since they're on the Internet.)....
FACTOID: McCain is opposed to pork barrels...and just what do you think pork rinds are made in? (Hmm, no pork...do I sense another reason for his popularity with the LJRM™?)
FACTOID: John McCain was in the Navy. Some homos in the '70s wrote a disco song about being "In the Navy." Just sayin'.....
Read the whole post with some great pictures Here.
Palin has proven her stupidity over and over in the few interviews that the McCain camp has allowed, but none have quite shown what a redneck, backwards ass, hillbilly, neocon she really is, by revealing the fact that she tried to ban books. Banning books is like banning all free thought.
If someone wrote a book about me, revealing all of my deepest darkest secrets (and there are many) and published "The Evil DJ Hobby," I would still not want it banned. I would want people to embrace it, and read it, to help make me a better person. I would learn from it. That's what human beings do, learn from things we read in books. We learn from our mistakes, and other peoples mistakes, and their life experiences. That's what books are, someone's life experience put into words. If Sarah Palin had ever read a book she would realize this. Books are a collection of peoples triumphs, mistakes, foibles, and wisdoms. An intelligent person can learn from other people's mistakes. An intelligent person can learn from history, no matter how painful that history. An ignorant person ignores the opportunity to learn. An ignorant person bans books.
For that one reason alone I could never vote for McCain and Palin. Even if McCain had saved my life from a burning building, putting his life in harms way to save mine, I still would not vote for him. Because the burning building could be a library, set on fire by the hot librarian.
So in support of Banned Book Week I vow not to vote for John McCain and Sarah Palin. And I do this for Holden Caulfield, for Harry Potter, and for Huckleberry Finn. For George Milton, for Scout, and for Guy Montag. For Prior Phillip, for Margaret, for Ralph and Piggy, for Ponyboy, and for Kilgore Trout.
Now on the surface that all sounds reasonable, but this is our dictator in chief breaking federal law: The Posse Comitatus Act, and the Insurrection Act. The Posse Comitatus Act is to "prohibit federal military personnel under federal authority from acting in a law enforcement capacity within the United States, except where expressly authorized by the Constitution or Congress." And the Isurrection Act sates "Whoever, except in cases and under circumstances expressly authorized by the Constitution or Act of Congress, willfully uses any part of the Army or the Air Force as a posse comitatus or otherwise to execute the laws shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than two years, or both."
The Constitution nor Congress have given the authority for bush to deploy the army within our borders. After 9/11 the opportunistic republican party scared congress into passing the patriot act which weakened the Posse Camitatus Act and the Isurrection Act, giving bush broad powers to deploy the military however he wished. This year however, Congress wanted to fix some of the problems with the patriot act and passed the 2008 Defense Authorization Bill, which repealed some of the patriot acts nastier bits, stripping the president of some of his powers to deploy the army.
I don't think/hope anything will come of this, but it does seem the timing of this is odd. It's one month before the election, three months before the most evil president we have ever had is to give up power, and right amidst the fall of Wall Street. But as with any conspiracy theory, coincidences are everywhere.
Dancing days are here again, especially if it has been a long time since you rocked and rolled.
OK, enough bad Zeppelin lyric lifts, let's get to the reunion tour, which reportedly lands at an arena near you in 2009.
According to the UK's Sun, Robert Plant finally caved once he found out that the rest of the band -- including guitar god Jimmy Page, bass deity John Paul Jones and Jason Bonham, the son of rock's arguably greatest drummer John Bonham -- was going ahead without him. The others were so committed to the idea that they were even auditioning singers for Plant's role, and were rumored to have found an American to fill his shoes.
Sucks to be that American today.
Once Plant absorbed the enormity of Led Zeppelin reuniting and touring without him, as well as the insane amount of money it would bring, he changed his mind and joined the party.
"He realized he couldn’t face the thought of not being involved," a source told the Sun.
Yes, I'm sure it was just the thought he realized, and not the green. That said, it is simply killer to see that Led Zeppelin has resuscitated its legend long enough to remind early adopters and late comers alike why it was one of the most potent live acts of all time. It will be interesting to see how Led Zeppelin II, the band not the album, translates to Generation Xbox.
Would you see them? How much would you pay? Is Zep a legend whose time has passed, or is it still the best rock band not just of the '70s, but of all time? I need these questions tackled. I'm going to have to take out a loan to see Led Zeppelin live. And I hear the banks aren't lending jack these days.
A 28-year-old Russian female, who visited Dubai on a tourist visa, and a 30-year-old male citizen of Lebanon, a salesman in a local store, were put on trial for drinking juice in a public place in the daytime during Muslim fasting.
The police caught the two people red-handed at a gas station in Dubai, Emirat.ru reports with reference to Gulf News.
In accordance with the Federal Penal Code of the United Arab Emirates, a public intake of food and beverages during daytime hours of the month of Ramadan is forbidden by Article 313. The article stipulates the punishment in the form of either a monetary penalty – up to 2,000 dirhems ($555) – or even a term of up to one month in prison.
The young people told the court that they were not Muslims and were thus unaware of the fact that their actions could be punishable.
The court took the mitigating circumstances into consideration, but found the defendants guilty, since ignorance did not exclude responsibility. The court ruled that the young people must pay the fine of 1,000 dirhems ($278) each.
I'm a little confused. Let me see if I have this straight...
* If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents, you're "exotic, different."
* Grow up in Alaska eating moose burgers, a quintessential American story.
* If your name is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.
* Name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, and you're a maverick.
* Graduate from Harvard Law School and be President of the Law Review, and you are unstable.
* Attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, you're well grounded.
* If you spend 3 years as a community organizer, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience.
* If your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest ranking executive.
* If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 beautiful daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian.
* If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.
* If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.
* If , while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other option in sex education in your state's school system while your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant , you're very responsible.
* If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's.
* If your husband is nicknamed "First Dude", with at least one DUI conviction and no college education, who didn't register to vote until age 25 and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable.
OK, much clearer now.
I have always loved that joke, and for some reason I think I saw that in a Bugs Bunny cartoon, but maybe I'm getting it mixed up with that stupid singing frog. Anybody else recall that being in a cartoon?
First there is the DRM on the ipod. Then there is the problem of not being able to just drag and drop songs on the blasted thing. You can't even delete anything off of it. You have to use their clunky proprietary software to do anything on the ipod. YOU CAN'T EVEN BOOKMARK AN AUDIO BOOK?!? The backlight never goes out, and because of that, it has horrible battery life. I could go on for hours about how much I hate this thing.
So after using the much hated ipod for about a month, I finally bought me a more useful MP3 player:
I think the leopard was just keeping the baby around for a midnight snack.
From Bill Maher's site Free Levi.org
New Rule: If we can’t, after all is said and done, make this election go the right way, at least we can save one man. I’m talking about young Master Levi Johnston. He’s the 18-year-old Alaskan hockey enthusiast who knocked up Sarah Palin’s daughter, and the National Enquirer describes him as “a boozing pot-smoker who doesn’t want to get married” – and John McCain thinks he found his soul mate!
We’ve all recently seen how evil henchman of the Republican party captured this poor innocent out of his natural habitat and forced him into a shotgun wedding, all so that their campaign narrative of fake family values could be upheld. When the 17-year-old daughter of the vice presidential candidate running on the Jesus ticket is “out to here,” it’s just better that Levi was introduced as the “fiancé.” Looks a little less white trashy.
But that doesn’t change the fact that right now Levi is America’s number one political prisoner. But Levi, you don’t have to be – this is the 21st century, at least in the blue states. We don’t have sharia law like in Saudi Arabia, or Alabama, and as much as the Bible thumpers would want it, we still don’t have arranged marriages in America. You don’t have to do this – you have options. You can pull a Juno – fuck, you live in Juneau! Or you could do what most people do with an unwanted child: give it to Angelina Jolie.
And if you’re worried about the baby, don’t – let’s get real dude, the way you are at 18, a baby’s better off not being around you – you’ll wind up losing it, or shooting it, or it’ll be on the bottom of your skate or something – just let the Palin womenfolk look after it for a while, one more infant in that Mormon compound they call a house won’t bother anybody – they’ll barely notice another kid at the table, and soon they won’t even remember whose seed it was that produced young “Trink” or “Truck” or “Puck” or whatever fucked up redneck name they give him.
In any event, we here at Real Time have taken the liberty of purchasing the website FreeLevi.org. And I will be happy to give the site over to you if you want to use it to get folks to contribute to some sort of liberty fund so you can get enough money to get out of that frozen meth lab they call a town. And even if the money doesn’t come in, listen to me, it’s not too late: just grab your skull bong, climb out the window, and get on the highway. I can’t actually come get you, or even let you stay at my place because I’m pretty sure you’d smoke all my weed, but just call me from a pay phone, I know of a safe house you can stay ‘til after the election, it’s like the witness protection program for baby-daddies.
And remember, Levi: California knows how to party. Trust me, the girls out here are going to love a big, high-sticking farm boy like you. If you play your cards right, in a couple weeks you could be screwing the lesbian right out of Lindsay Lohan.
For a more accurate telling of this story watch Robert Wuhl's Assume the Position. The true story of Paul Revere starts at about the 6 minute mark.
- John Green, McCain’s campaign liaison to Congress, has lobbied for Chevron, Hess, and the American Petroleum Institute, among others. This work, which took place between 2002 and 2008, earned Green and his firm $3,450,000. Employees and PACs of his clients have given McCain a total of $106,050 since 1989.
- Wayne Berman, a leading McCain bundler, has lobbied for Chevron, Amerada Hess, and the American Petroleum Institute, among others. This work, which took place between 2004 and 2008, earned Berman and his firm $3,170,000. Employees
and PACs of his clients have given McCain a total of $105,300 since 1989.
- Steve Phillips, a leading McCain bundler, has lobbied for eight different oil and gas entities, including BP and
Occidental Petroleum. This work, which took place between 2000 and 2007, earned Phillips and his firm $3,130,000. Employees and PACs of his clients have given McCain $40,950 since 1989.
- Charlie Black, a senior McCain advisor, has lobbied for Occidental Petroleum and Yukos Oil. This work, which took place between 2001 and 2007, earned Black and his firm $1,725,000. Employees and PACs of his clients have given McCain $18,550 since 1989.
- James Hyland, a McCain bundler, has lobbied for BP, the Independent Fuel Operators Association, the New England Fuel Institute, and Occidental Petroleum. This work, which took place between 2001 and 2004, earned Hyland and his firm $1,300,000. Employees and PACs of his clients have given McCain $34,050 since 1989.
- Rebecca Anderson, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has lobbied for three oil and gas companies: Bass Brothers Enterprises, Cheniere Energy, and Sunoco. This work, which took place between 2002 and 2007, earned Anderson and her firm $1,280,000. Employees of her clients have given McCain a total of $15,800 since 1989.
- Frank Donatelli, deputy chairman of the RNC, has lobbied for Exxon Mobil. This work, which took place between 1998 and 1999, earned Donatelli and his firm $1,120,000. Employees and PACs of his clients have given McCain $46,751 since 1989.
- Robert Asher, a bundler for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for WMPI Pty., a fuel supplier. This work, which took place between 2003 and 2005, earned Ascher and his firm $750,000.
- Kevin Fay, a fundraiser for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Orion Refining. This work, which took place between 1998 and 2002, earned Fay and his firm $650,000.
- Tom Loeffler, McCain’s former national finance co-chairman, has lobbied for Tetco. This work, which took place between 2005 and 2007, earned Loeffler and his firm $620,000.
- Richard Hohlt, a fundraiser for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Chevron. This work, which took place between 2006 and 2008, earned Hohlt and his firm $241,500. Chevron employees and PACs have given McCain $30,000 since 1989.
- Jack Oliver, a bundler for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Shell Oil. This work, which took place between 2006 and 2007, earned Oliver and his firm $240,000. Shell employees and PACs have given McCain $7,050 since 1989.
- Dick Zimmer, McCain New Jersey honorary co-chair, has lobbied for Schlumberger Ltd. This work, which took place between 2002 and 2005, earned Zimmer and his firm $240,000.
- Sloan Rappoport, a bundler for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Koch Industries. This work, which took place between 2005 and 2006, earned Rappoport and his firm $200,000. Employees of Koch Industries have given McCain $9,000 since 1989.
- Kirsten Chadwick, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has lobbied for Atlantic Richfield. This work, which took place between 1999 and 2000, earned Chadwick and her firm $160,000. Employees and PACs of Atlantic Richfield have given McCain $13,000 since 1989.
- Peter Madigan, a bundler for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Shell Oil and Michael F. Barrett. This work, which took place between 1998 and 2002, earned Madigan and his firm $140,000. Employees of Shell Oil have given McCain $7,050 since 1989.
- James Pitts, a bundler for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for the Natural Gas Vehicle Coalition. This work, which took place in 2004, earned Pitts and his firm $140,000.
- Eric Burgeson, a fundraiser for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for BP. This work, which took place between 1999 and 2000, earned Burgeson and his firm $120,000. Employees and PACs of BP have given McCain $15,500 since 1989.
- Randy Scheunemann, McCain’s defense and foreign policy coordinator, has lobbied for BP. This work, which took place between 1999 and 2000, earned Scheunemann and his firm $120,000. Employees and PACs of BP have given McCain $15,500 since 1989.
- Jeffrey Weiss, a fundraiser for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Yukos Oil. This work, which took place in 2004, earned Weiss and his firm $115,000.
- Ashley Davis, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has lobbied for TORP Technology. This work, which took place between 2006 and 2007, earned Davis and her firm $80,000.
- James Courter, a bundler for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for the New England Fuel Institute. This work, which took place in 2000, earned Courter and his firm $60,000.
- Vicki Hart, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has lobbied for Enron, the New England Fuel Institute, and Petroport. This work, which took place between 1998 and 2000, earned Hart and her firm at least $60,000. Employees and PACs of Enron have given McCain $11,500 since 1989.
- Elise Finley Pickering, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has lobbied for Koch Industries. This work, which took place between 2007 and 2008, earned Pickering and her firm $50,000 since 1989.
- Carlos Bonilla, an economic policy advisor to the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Oceaneering Intl. This work, which took place in 2008, earned Bonilla and his firm $40,000.
- Kerry Cammack, a fundraiser for the McCain campaign, has lobbied for Exxon Mobil. This work, which took place in 2006, earned Cammack and his firm $40,000. Employees and PACs of Exxon Mobil have given McCain $46,751 since 1989.
- Melissa Edwards, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has lobbied for Oceaneering Intl. This work, which took place in 2008, earned Edwards and her firm $40,000.
- Susan Molinari, a member of the Women for McCain Steering Committee, has also lobbied for Oceaneering Intl. This work, which took place in 2008, earned Molinari and her firm $40,000.
- Doug Davenport, a former McCain regional campaign manager, has lobbied for Welldog. This work, which took place in 2005, earned Davenport and his firm $20,000.
So it is apparently necessary for me to state once again not what kind of church I believe in — for that should be important only to me — but what kind of America I believe in.
I believe in an America where the separation of church and state is absolute, where no Catholic prelate would tell the president (should he be Catholic) how to act, and no Protestant minister would tell his parishioners for whom to vote; where no church or church school is granted any public funds or political preference; and where no man is denied public office merely because his religion differs from the president who might appoint him or the people who might elect him.
I believe in an America that is officially neither Catholic, Protestant nor Jewish; where no public official either requests or accepts instructions on public policy from the Pope, the National Council of Churches or any other ecclesiastical source; where no religious body seeks to impose its will directly or indirectly upon the general populace or the public acts of its officials; and where religious liberty is so indivisible that an act against one church is treated as an act against all.
For while this year it may be a Catholic against whom the finger of suspicion is pointed, in other years it has been, and may someday be again, a Jew— or a Quaker or a Unitarian or a Baptist. It was Virginia's harassment of Baptist preachers, for example, that helped lead to Jefferson's statute of religious freedom. Today I may be the victim, but tomorrow it may be you — until the whole fabric of our harmonious society is ripped at a time of great national peril.
Finally, I believe in an America where religious intolerance will someday end; where all men and all churches are treated as equal; where every man has the same right to attend or not attend the church of his choice; where there is no Catholic vote, no anti-Catholic vote, no bloc voting of any kind; and where Catholics, Protestants and Jews, at both the lay and pastoral level, will refrain from those attitudes of disdain and division which have so often marred their works in the past, and promote instead the American ideal of brotherhood.
That is the kind of America in which I believe. And it represents the kind of presidency in which I believe — a great office that must neither be humbled by making it the instrument of any one religious group, nor tarnished by arbitrarily withholding its occupancy from the members of any one religious group. I believe in a president whose religious views are his own private affair, neither imposed by him upon the nation, or imposed by the nation upon him as a condition to holding that office.
I would not look with favor upon a president working to subvert the First Amendment's guarantees of religious liberty. Nor would our system of checks and balances permit him to do so. And neither do I look with favor upon those who would work to subvert Article VI of the Constitution by requiring a religious test — even by indirection — for it. If they disagree with that safeguard, they should be out openly working to repeal it.
I want a chief executive whose public acts are responsible to all groups and obligated to none; who can attend any ceremony, service or dinner his office may appropriately require of him; and whose fulfillment of his presidential oath is not limited or conditioned by any religious oath, ritual or obligation.
Go to NPR.org to read the whole transcript and watch the whole video.
9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.
7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!
6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.
2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
Then you get this video of the same kids 15 years later.
Here they are side by side.
I heard the biggest gift on most neocon's wish list was a video of a muslim being waterboarded. Not anyone specific, just anybody who looks vagely unamerican. Another big item is this bumper sticker: 9/11, Yee Fucking Haw, Watch Out You Muslim Towel Head Bastards Because Now You Have Unleashed The Fury Of The United States National Guard, And They Are Going To Kick You And Your Women And Children's Asses Back To The Stone Age All For Your Own Good Because You Are An A-Rab, Lord Have Mercy On Your Heretical Soul, Amen And God Bless America. Yee Haw!
I hope everyone realizes how outrageos this is. The gross tragedy the republicans have commited against the world by using the memories of the 2998 people that died September 11th, 2001 as an excuse to gain power and influence on the world. It's disgusting. The victims of the September 11th terrorist attack have been used politically by the republicans as an excuse to re-elect more conservatives just because they say they are hard on terror. The real terror is the republican party. Terrorism is defined as "the systematic use of fear especially as a means of coercion." That is exactly what the republicans do. They are sysematically using the attacks of September 11th to strike fear in our hearts and using that as a means of coercion. I wish the American people would get hard on terror and hunt bush down and try him for the deaths of all the American sevicemen who have died at his hands of his illegal war.
Yes this should be a day of remembrance. We should remember the innocent people who died on September 11th, 2001. But we also have a duty to remember all 90,000 people you and I have killed since then in their name. We elected and then re-elected this murdering asshole bush, which means all that blood is on our hands. We should remember this so as not to let this happen again. We should not let our emotions and our prejudice and our greed and our blind support for our party lead us into war ever again. September 11th should be remembered as the day we tucked our tails between our legs and bowed down to the terrorism of the ruling party and let them have free reign. The day we let the republican party fuck us because we are afraid of appearing weak. We should remember this as the day we got fucked by george bush and his war mongering friends.